How To Choose A Healthy Religious Community
Many people find that belonging to a religious community can provide the support they want and need.

Circumstances in life can be overwhelming at times, but being part of a healthy religious community can provide an opportunity for many to enrich and be enriched by others. A key driver of overall well-being is having positive relationships in life. Friendship, mutual care, and support can cure loneliness, encourage the heart, and provide strength when you're faced with adversity. It makes a big difference when others know that you have their "six" and they have yours. Many people find that belonging to a religious community is a key aspect of their spiritual fitness and their support system. It draws from a well of collective strength that is far greater than its individual members.

There are several kinds of groups that can provide a sense of community, but a great number of people feel that there is something unique and significant about being around people who share common spiritual values, beliefs, and practices. Throughout history people of different spiritual traditions have joined together to live out their spirituality in community and create good in society. Many healthcare systems, institutions of higher learning, and humanitarian organizations also have their roots in people coming together for spiritual purposes in service of others.

Many find it meaningful to join with others to make a greater difference than individuals can do on their own. Most people have limited time and resources, but when individuals join with others it's possible to create a collective impact to provide financial assistance, disaster relief, food, job training, drug and alcohol recovery, shelter for the homeless, care for victims of abuse, and other worthwhile endeavors.

Even though the idea of a spiritual community at the core is positive, sometimes a group can drift from its intended purpose and become toxic. Without accountability, it's possible for negative people to seize control of a religious community and cause a great deal of spiritual, emotional, and physical damage. When a spiritual community is healthy and vibrant, it creates life, provides healing, and uplifts people. When one gets off course it degrades people and leaves a tremendous amount of hurt in its wake.

On the outside people can look healthy. They can stand tall, be slim, and move with urgency. However, on the inside they can have high blood pressure, chronic inflammation, and elevated blood sugars. The same principle applies to religious groups. They can pass the eye test on the outside, but it's important to look inward to get a better idea of the spiritual health of the community. So how do you do that? There aren't any perfect ways, but there are some questions you can use to help you choose a group that works for you:

• How do they define themselves? Who do they say they are?

• What are they for? What are they against?

• What is their reputation in the local area?

• Do their beliefs and practices align with yours?

• Is their history something you would be proud of?

• How do they talk to and about others? Through positive or degrading communication?

• Do they create positive value in society? In what way(s) do they create goodwill and care for the welfare of others?

• How are they governed? Is power centralized in one person or do others have a say? How free are people to raise questions about practices and the operation of the organization?

• How are important decisions made? What is the role of leaders? What is the role of members?

• Are financial records open? Do they use money in a way that is consistent with your values?

• How do they resolve conflict? 
  

Being part of a religious community can be fulfilling, so it's important to find one that is healthy. PCS moves and multiple deployments can make it especially challenging to find and connect with a healthy spiritual community. A chaplain can be a great resource to help you find on-base and off-base religious groups to consider. But then do some exploring. A healthy religious community won't try to pressure you to make a decision quickly. It will allow you the time to look around and come back to the community where you feel most comfortable.